For the most part, only minor clarification and phrasing revisions were made. Below are some examples of the kind of changes requested:
From Chapter 2:
Kate dug her nails into the Formica. “How can she drink a tea without knowing what’s—?” Kate clamped her mouth shut. Good grief, what was she doing ranting at the poor counter girl?
Since Kate’s thoughts and emotion were adequately shown through her action and dialogue, the editor cut these thoughts from before Kate’s outburst: No, no, no. She should know what’s in her tea. She should know.
From Chapter 4
He sprinted toward the sound of the scream—certain it had been Kate’s. He prayed that she’d merely been frightened by a wild animal.
Tree branches slapped his face. With no idea of the true situation, he didn’t dare call out and risk alerting an attacker of his approach. He hurtled a log, laser focused on the direction of the scream. Why hadn’t she just trusted him to look into this?
Explanation: sentence deleted for improved pacing
From Chapter 24:
What if I’m wrong? What if Daisy did kill herself.”
“You don’t believe that.” Keith sunk into the chair next to the bed, his chest deflating like a pricked balloon.
“I don’t want to believe it.” Kate fisted the bed sheets in her hands. “Daisy was the one who showed me who God is. If she took her own life, where does that leave God?”
“Is your faith in who God is, or who you thought Daisy was?”
Sunlight edged its way past the curtains. Kate longed to feel its warmth. She didn’t doubt God. Did she?
Julie had accused her of pushing for this investigation because she couldn’t accept the police department’s findings. Wouldn’t accept them.
Because if she had, that meant Daisy had taken her life into her own hands … on purpose. “I don’t know anymore.”
Keith patted her arm. “We all face doubts from time to time, but that’s when more than ever we need to go to the source.”
Editor cut the following from the above for succinctness to improve impact and pacing:
[Keith’s father continues] “What does the Bible say?”
“Jesus is the same yesterday and today and forever.”
“Yup, and just before that verse, the apostle Paul tells us to imitate the faith of our leaders. Daisy led you to faith. Following her example is a good thing, but she can’t be a substitute for the true source of your faith.”
